What is Restorative Grief?

Mandy Capehart
2 min readNov 27, 2020

Grief will never be a positive. Loss does not make us better, happier, or save us from ourselves. Much of the grief narrative in Western culture revolves around reflecting and striving to find a way to accept a future you didn’t ask for and can’t return.

We need a new methodology of healing in grief. A model of tools, wisdom, and principles to give ourselves space to take our time and find hope amid the tempest.

The Restorative Grief model is one that reflects on the impermanent nature of life while giving us tools to bring peace to our mind, body, soul, and spirit even as we grieve. By becoming present with our pain, we offer ourselves the grace we need to heal.

Photo by Devon Janse van Rensburg on Unsplash

We reject shame, closed-minded absolutes, and platitudes in exchange for intentional, unhurried passage through our pain at our own pace. A restorative model of grieving allows the flow of life to uncover a new rhythm of rituals and correct any damaging beliefs about loss we may inadvertently carry.

The more time we spend bringing ourselves back to the present moment, the more intentionally we will make decisions about our needs and next steps. Our healing takes the forefront, allowing each wave of unexpected grief to propel us forward still standing instead of tossing us about in the surf.

Engaging the flow of sorrow as it presents itself allows for gentle and measured movement through our loss. We notice the waves approaching, welcoming them as an old friend with familiarity. We are equipped to wade through lament, stronger than before because we have embraced the plunge into the unknown and know we will breathe again.

The Restorative Grief Project is an online course with a small group of individuals online via private Facebook group. Participants will receive access to daily curriculum, action items, tools, journal prompts, and additional resources. This is a self-paced group, although participants will benefit from guided discussion groups by staying engaged!

Mandy Capehart is a certified grief and life coach, and creator of The Restorative Grief Project. The Restorative Grief Project is an online community focusing on one another’s stories and new methodologies for grief, creating a safe environment for our souls to heal and our spirits to be revived. For more information, visit www.MandyCapehart.com/grief or follow along with weekly columns on Ask A Grief Coach!

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Mandy Capehart

Writing about grief, beliefs, & psych/mindfulness. Author, Trauma-informed Certified Grief Educator & Master Mindset Coach. Somatic embodiment Practitioner.